OK, I’m going to tell you right off that this is going to be an emotional post. Sorry, feel free to look away and visit another page if you need to (there are some great ideas at the Garden Party), but my son is graduating today and emotion is all I have today.
Let’s just get this out of the way first, “Aack- I can’t believe it!” Whew, now here are some of the thoughts and emotions going through my head and heart:
When I was newly married and teaching preschoolers, there were a couple of sweet little boys with blond hair and beautiful smiles that I fell in love with. It awakened the “baby desire” in me and I prayed that I would have a little boy like the ones that I had been teaching. Imagine my great joy when we were blessed with this adorable boy:
Ah, be still my heart.
- Blond? Check.
- Wonderful smile? Check.
- Great laugh? Check.
- Fun to be around? Check.
- Sweet as all get-out? Umm, Double Check.
But as you moms (and dads) know, there has been so much more than I could ever have guessed, as well. He’s kind and caring. He’s brilliant (seriously- he’s going to college on a full-ride scholarship, whoo-hoo!). He’s fun to talk to and has some great ideas. His activities and friends have taken us places we would have never gone.
He’s enriched our lives. But when I see this man he’s become (and Brian’s almost totally gray hair…), I can’t help but think, “Where has all the time gone?” It’s cliched I know, and I remember older parents telling me all the time when he was young to cherish every minute, and I believe I did. But it’s a question I still ask.
I can remember with crystal clarity the sweet laughing boy in the first picture. A few years ago I realized I never pictured myself as a mom of teenagers- it was always me holding little hands and teaching them letters and numbers. I’ve kinda been fumbling along in the teenage years, trying to figure it all out (sorry, I haven’t yet).
And so graduation seems the definition of bittersweet to me – I’m so proud of the person he’s become and all he’s accomplished, and yet…
And yet I ache sometimes for the little boy with the sweet smile.
This is something you can’t prepare for or even understand until you’re standing in the middle of it. And that’s probably for the best. Just enjoy each day as it comes.
This is linked to Finer Things Friday